SCOTLAND AHOY! I always enjoy an event where we get to refer to them as the Earl and Countess of Strathearn. And yet again, William gets to go to an event where they give him booze. I smell escandalo! Stay tuned for the tabloid headline DUKE OF DRUNKBRIDGE??! Wills Can’t Perform Royal Duties Without A Tipple; Kate Fears For His Life As He Drinks to Forget!!!!!!!

And that being said: I’m sure many of you have read about recent events wherein a civilian allegedly got a snap of Kate’s bum as her skirt blew up when she and William exited a helicopter, which was then sold to a German tabloid (one notorious for running particularly prurient snaps, including a topless shot of Camilla just last year — is it weird that my reaction to finding out that Cams is sunbathing topless on a yacht at 65 is to think, “good for you!”? — and a full frontal of Charles [!!] a while back). I personally have doubts that this photo is real, for a variety of reasons, although I did not want to examine it for a lengthy period of time; I only saw it when someone that I follow on Twitter posted it in their feed, and I am not going to link to it because I think the fact that any these photos were published is creepy and invasive. Among other things, I find it suspicious that no one else working or watching this day of the tour (including myself) saw any of this come to pass. Regardless, I’d love it if we didn’t pay this nonsense too much attention — things happen, and I don’t even know if I believe this particular thing actually did happen — and focus instead on the Shenanigans in Scotland (although frankly, I am let down that William didn’t wear a kilt and flash everyone to even the playing field). But I understand that Fug Nation probably Has Thoughts, and I don’t want to put the kibosh on you guys, and it seemed weird for me to ignore the kerfuffle entirely, especially as it’s been brought up elsewhere and surely would be again. So here we are. I trust any discussion that might unfurl will not get nasty, hysterical, contentious, or weird. I have seen some really appalling comments made about Kate with regards to this, and that will not be tolerated here. Thank you.

We can also just talk about coats, though. I’d LOVE to just talk about coats. Because I LOVE this Jonathan Saunders coat, although I would definitely have belted it they way they did on the runway — I think it’s better with the belt, and she’s certainly worn a belted coat before. As far as that goes, What Kate Wore has a delicious amount of details, as usual, as well as a look at the dress she’s wearing underneath (not ON Kate, in general). And in addition to coats, there are children! And animals! And blue suits! And MORE DRINKING!

[Photos: Getty,  Andrew Milligan/PA Wire]