If my online sleuthing is correct — as in, I went to People’s website — then Rihanna in this photo is leaving her son’s birthday party. It does not explain the satin, a.k.a. the devil’s second skin, but the pants at least make sense because I can definitely see her not caring if any toddler shenanigans ruin them. It also contextualizes the balloon sculpture. Well, I’m not TOTALLY sure why it’s in the shape of a mouth, and one with gold teeth…? Or a grill? Or that needs a dentist? I guess it could just be… two hot dogs with a handle. Regardless, yes, we know WHY she has that with her, but… I’m a bit sad about it. I hoped Rihanna just decided that rubbercraft would be her summer passion, and that we’d see her around New York this year with a series of elaborate latex brooches, maybe ending with one that depicts her own face. Styled by Party City. I had BIG DREAMS, and now I have to be at peace with only a temporary lip job.

[Photo: Robert Kamau/GC Images]
Tags: Rihanna