Oh, Jessica Alba. We JUST lauded this girl’s unexpectedly great taste in 2013, and so of course she goes and does this:
Her head is still good, obviously — hard to screw that up — but that dress is all wrong. We can all agree that Jessica Alba has a ridiculously fit bod, so this too-tight criss-cross thing is basically a dangerous criminal for what it’s doing to her. It should be locked up and kept off the streets. It can’t be trusted; it is a menace, with a particular interest in making mammary pancakes.
And from the side…
… it just kind of looks like a massive sneaker homage. Allison Williams’s dress did shoelaces better, I think, and not for nothing, Jessica probably should’ve worn those shoes, too. Maybe they should go on a styling spree together, or her people could just kidnap Allison and give her clothes to Jessica. Not that I am advocating fighting one crime with another crime, but… it could just be more of a gentle luxury trap-her-in-a-limo situation. I’m just saying.