I guess Kim Kard here was honored at the Variety Power of Women event for her work with Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles, something I had no idea she was affiliated with and have never heard mentioned in the same breath as her name — but I hope that’s just because I wasn’t paying attention, as I would be thrilled if Children’s benefited from Kim’s enormous, confounding, enormous, and enormous fame.

 

Let’s pretend, then, that she chose this thematically — as, say, a fashion representation of Sexy Lab Coat.

The thing is, that overcoat could have been cool. But as usual, the unavoidable undercurrent of Kardashian means it’s not really allowed to be. We get a sheer meridian bisecting her chest and peeks of nude brassiere, all designed to make sure you’re staring there first. As if she constantly defines herself by that asset. I just wish she’d show more belief that there are other parts of her worth looking at, you know? Remember how great she is in red lipstick? Throw a deep crimson shade on her here and reconsider the hair, and even THAT would be a step forward. What I wouldn’t give for a real, actual Hollywood stylist to take her on for one month and see what kind of difference it might make.

Oh, and lest you wonder how she accessorized:

With extreme subtlety. Naturally.

[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]