Have a blessed weekend, y’all!

The Emmys were Sunday! If you missed any of our coverage, you can catch up here.

Do you need a new jean jacket? Admit it: You do.

Did you see the Downton Abbey movie over the last week and need to talk about it? We have an open thread for you.

This is fun and logistics-y, at Vox: How Reese Witherspoon became the new high priestess of book clubs. (It is true that if you are the writer of women’s fiction, you REALLLLLLLLLLLLY want Reese to feature your book.)

Per Lainey, they’re allegedly remaking Clue???? I reject this!

This is extremely interesting piece at Vice, about actors who are cast to play pedophiles or child molesters, and how it impacts them (and us).

MANY people have sent me this WaPo piece about Jessicas Turning 30 and, uh, yes, I too am but 30 years old. (I am the only Jessica I know. I am from the Jennifer era. My parents were very much ahead of the curve and would argue they remain so.)

At the Cut: Is This Spider Brooch a Secret Message or a Simple Fall Goth Accessory?

At Vulture, this interview with Fiona Apple is great. I remember, about ten years ago, I was giving a dude who I liked a ride home from something, and Criminal came on my playlist, and he was like, “are you still listening to FIONA APPLE?!?” and I was like, “GET OUT OF MY CAR.”

Also at Lainey: Brad Pitt has a new girlfriend?!?! (I also weirdly confabulated this headline the last time I saw it with another publication’s headline and accidentally read that said girlfriend was Kamala Harris. THAT would be A DEVELOPMENT.)

Also at Vox: How The Good Place taught moral philosophy to its characters — and its creators

Excellent, at The Undefeated: Leslie Jones may be gone, but a change still needs to come to ‘SNL’. (Did you know that JORDAN PEELE auditioned to play Obama for SNL and Lorne Michels passed?!?! THAT WAS DUMB. Although it worked out well for Key and Peele.)

This story at The Atlantic, about Kenyon College’s campus cat, is the greatest. To wit: “Moxie regularly jumps up onto the backpacks of passing humans, traversing campus on his two-legged chariots. He delights the school, but also disturbs it. Recently, for example, the fire department had to rescue the cat from a coffee shop’s roof. He likes to infiltrate classroom buildings, too; signs warning students not to let Moxie into the lecture halls abound. Every once in a while he enters Kenyon’s on-campus Episcopal church unannounced, in the middle of Reverend Rachel Kessler’s sermons.”

At Collectors Weekly: Stirred Not Shaken: How Do You End Up With 50,000 Swizzle Sticks?

At Pajiba, this is a service: How to Get Billy Porter His Much Deserved EGOT–A Pajiba Guide

This is neat! Via Vogue: Here’s What It’s Like to Get a Wardrobe Makeover With Celebrity Stylist Karla Welch’s New App

I really enjoyed Samantha Irby’s funny and delicious essay/recipe on/for tuna noodle casserole, at Heated, and now also I want some? For example: “First you need to call your mama, ask her to leave the old Corningware baking dish she stole from your grandma on her front steps, then swing by there on your way home from the grocery store and pick it up because tuna casserole just doesn’t taste right unless it’s from a weird, faded glass dish that only old people care about.” This whole piece is A DELIGHT.

Speaking of cooking, I wanna see the tablescape for this one. At Celebitchy: Sandra Lee & Gov. Andrew Cuomo have broken up after 14 years together

Whomst among us: A man took LSD and fell in a lake at Disneyland Paris. He was found naked and confused hours later. [WaPo]

Just gonna leave this here, from Socialite Life: Nicolas Cage vs. a Jaguar and an Assassin (in the Primal Trailer). That seems about right!