Well, “head” and “toe” are fine. It’s getting between them that has me straddling the fence.

Naomi has done a lot of good things to keep from being washed out, and I WANT to appreciate them; unfortunately I’m too distracted by the pattern. She’s almost pulling it off, but it’s just such a jerky-jerky mishmash in places that it feels like a patchwork ode to interior design elements of the 1980s (seriously, turn her top upside down, and I think I saw a frosted-glass sconce that was its twin).

And then that one cutout on the right — the only one, I think — lost me. I want to call it fashion through the lens of a kindergarten art project, but I have spent a lot of time with kindergarten art projects lately, and seriously, some of those kids cut and color things better than I do. They’d probably have assembled this more adeptly and flatteringly in less time.

Evaluate this by my kids' TK-class grading system:

  • Smiley face with hair: It's excellent work (12%, 256 Votes)
  • Smiley face with a circle around it: It's totally right at grade level and everything's going to be fine. (34%, 713 Votes)
  • Smiley face with no circle around it: Substandard but with signs of effort (47%, 963 Votes)
  • Face with eyes and an *o* for a mouth: WE ARE AT DEFCON 1 (7%, 136 Votes)

Total Voters: 2,068

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[Photo: Fame/Flynet]

Tags: Naomi Watts