I literally do not even have words for how much I hate this. What is stronger than, “this don’t impress me much”?

It is so weird. First of all, it’s possible that Shania Twain is the only person in America still wearing stretchy thigh-high boots plus a mini who is NOT: a) working the main stage at The Landing Strip, b) a Julia Roberts impersonator, c) strutting it on RuPaul’s Drag Race? Second, I keep trying to envision the conversation Shania and her stylist had about this and every time I do, SOMEONE makes the kind of face you do not want to see from a beauty professional. In short: I truly do not know how this happened, and I would suggest someone be fired, but I suspect that would end with Shania firing herself, and someone’s got to keep paying the rent on her Swiss castle.

[Photos: Getty]