TBS rolled into this “awards” “show” right after the NCAA selection show on Sunday, and therefore I watched it until I couldn’t stand it anymore — approximately half an hour. (Parenthetically, the fact that my college basketball team has been relegated to the play-in game on Tuesday [mostly due to the fact that our team is mediocre because one of Lavar Ball’s dumb kids and two other equally dumb kids thought it would be smart to shoplift in China and got themselves kicked off the team] and said play-in game overlaps with my tax appointment is such a 2018 thing to have happened to me.) I yapped about this a bit in the post about Jackie Cruz’s very silly outfit at this event, but iHeartRadio is the company that used to be Clear Channel, and they own most of the radio stations in America, and ergo many of the people who attended this event did so because they want to continue to be played on the radio and that’s why every time the camera cut to someone in the audience, that person was sitting at a tiny table in front of a sad pile macarons on a plate looking like they were there under duress. It was hosted by DJ Khaled, who does not have the skills to host an awards show — and that is not shade; it is hard to host an awards show — and who also, conveniently, won several awards, and Hailey Baldwin, who was fine. She was alive, she stood upright, words came out of her mouth, and she wore a shirt that said Stoneman Douglas High School on it, so I guess that was cool.
Basically everyone on this red carpet has a thousand yard stare that says, “why am I here?”