BRUCE WILLIS: Holy shit, Demi.

DEMI MOORE: Yes, I AM lucky this hair suits me.

BW: No, Demi. Look. Look, Demi.

DM: I am. Into middle distance.

BW: Screw middle distance. Check your left periphery. You’ve gotta see this.

DM: G.I. Jane doesn’t gotta do anything. G.I. Jane is in command of her own OH MY GOD,┬áHOLY SHIT, Bruce.

FRANCE CANNES FILM, CANNES, France

BW: RIGHT?

DM: Didn’t she JUST spend all that time in this movie wearing a┬ádiaper anchored by strategically placed Ace bandages?

BW: For the art.

DM: And yet she wanted a couture version?

BW: It’s like if a loincloth made love to a butler’s pull.

DM: No, it’s like we are WATCHING the loincloth make love to the butler’s pull.

BW: You picked a hell of a night to wear double long layers of fabric.

DM: Should I give her my gigantic rose coat?

BW: Depends. Do butler’s pulls get cold after sex?

DM: No, no, it doesn’t go with her loincloth.

FRANCE CANNES FILM, CANNES, France

BW: Aren’t you glad you looked?

DM: Bruce. My treasure. You were right to tell me.

BW: She and Luc aren’t gonna be married for long, are they?

DM: No, Bruce. They won’t.

BW: But we will.

DM: Sure! Yes. Sure.

[Photos: Shutterstock]