The noise when I saw this was what I imagine it’d sound like if Maggie ran over Ralph Wiggum with the Simpsons’ car: a strangled, startled yawp followed by some squeaking.This is Stella McCartney in peak ruinous Stella form. It’s hideous, it’s cut poorly, it chops her body in all the wrong places, it has left her with an apparent lack of confidence in what shoes to pair with it, and in general Emma seems to have divorced herself from the reality of what is on her body. It seems to me that her face says, “I am so bored of myself. I’m tired of talking. The La La Land backlash is so strong now that it has its own backlash, and now it’s practically subversive to admit you liked it. I need to get past this but right now all I want to do is get back in bed and sleep until Thursday.” In fact, that’s exactly what this dress is to me: the Wednesday of her wardrobe, something that must be pushed through in order to access the more fun stuff on the other side. Keep pushing, Emma. You’re in the home stretch. Try Lamaze.

[Photo: Getty]