I just need to open with Informative Caption:

“A model presents a spiky dress of metal disks for Paco Rabanne’s last haute couture show during the Autumn-Winter 1999/2000 collections in Paris, [on] 17 July 1999. Paco Rabanne’s interpretation of the dire prophecies of Nostradamus has convinced him that the Russian space station, Mir, will drop on Paris on the day of the total eclipse of the sun, 11 August 1999. Rabanne has said this will be his last haute couture show and has promised that if his predictions do not come to pass, he will never expect to be taken seriously again.”

!!!!!!

a) The Russian space station Mir was brought out of orbit totally normally in March, 2001.

b) This was his last haute couture show — he said it “was not in harmony with the new millennium,” which is actually probably true. I do not believe that he actually stopped expecting to be taken seriously.

c) Paco Rabanne’s Wiki has a whole section titled “eccentricities,” including the line, “[h]e claims he has lived several lives (including that of a prostitute in the time of Louis XV), to have known Jesus in a previous life, to have seen God three times, to have been visited by extraterrestrials, to have murdered Tutankhamun, and to be 75,000 years old.” Well, where is the 500-page autobiography, Paco? We’re waiting! Judge Judy Taps Watch Dot Gif, my friend!

d) He also said he’d stop making predictions if this Mir one was wrong, and then later said he would keep making predictions because the Virgin Mary told him to keep it up.

e) Although remarkably talented, I feel like he would not be an easy person to work for.

f) Lady Gaga, this HAS to be calling your name. Don’t let me down!

(Photo: THOMAS COEX/AFP via Getty Images)