“HOLA LOVER. Listen, Veronica. I know what you’re thinking: ‘Why would Jennifer pinch herself so hard with fabric so early in the morning? And why did I do it too?’ The answer, Valerie, is that old saying, “‘To err is human and to Lopez is divine.’ I am the world’s mentor and so of course you are going to absorb my energy. I am the diffuser of my own essential oils. As for the clothes, Vivian my lover, it is important to make mistakes and suffer a bit to remind yourself that you are ALIVE. To chafe is to FEEL. To pinch is to BREATHE. I need the world to know I am not perfect but yet I endure, and so that is why I cannot feel my boobs right now. Are yours numb yet, Vicky? They will be, or else you are doing it wrong.”

[Photos: Gustavo Caballero/South Beach ]