This shot of Jewel hoiking up her frock whilst being mic’ed before performing at the Rockefeller Center Tree-Lighting Event! (I feel like that event has a PR-approved exclamation point at the end of it, probably, right?) kind of tells you all you need to know:

But the front view just confirms all of our suspicions:

Girl! That dress is festive as hell, but also one of your boobs is about to pop out to get a better look at the tree, which kind of makes you look like a holiday card as styled by Brandi Glanville. (No hate, Brandi: I like you, other than when you’re fighting with Lisa. Which appears to be about to happen on this season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and I would just like to say that I am not okay with that. Lisa’s A plot for the season could be that she killed a man and I would still be like, “LISA IS THE BEST.” Why does ANYONE take on Lisa? It’s NEVER successful. The audience loves her too much. Hey, did I ever tell you about the time that Heather and I were on a plane to New York along with Lisa and Ken AND GIGGY? It was thrilling for me. Anyway. Wow, that was quite a digression. I guess I really had some stuff about RHoBH to get off my chest. Much like this dress is trying to get off Jewel’s. Phew! Brought it back around.)

[Photos: Getty]