Victoria (whom you may remember from the Globes, and if you didn’t, I’m very sorry that I just harshed your innocence) is a British socialite — basically who I imagine Paris Hilton would like to be, a.k.a., dubiously employed but unquestionably titled — and Joanna is a model who is also on one of the Real Housewives shows. Both of them would like you to look at them, it seems. Be careful what you wish for, ladies.

First up: Lady V.

For one bone-chilling moment, I thought that was Stacy Keibler, and I feel like Intern George may have gotten some e-mails this morning as well from well-meaning friends who wrote, “George, she’s OFF THE RAILS, pull her back on.” Fortunately, it’s not Stacy; just a supremely bronzed person wearing a slow-dying bubble bath.

And in the other corner, we have Ms. Krupa, in a knockoff of the dress that Jaimie Alexander may wish she’d never worn because it is forever linked with her name:

It turns out that dress could get cheaper. Seriously, just make someone tow you around in the actual shower, if it’s that important to you to look like you’re mid-shampoo.

[Photos: Fame/Flynet]