So, I’m pretty sure I need to be watching the German show Wetten Dass. I mean, it’s the show that brought us Karl Lagerfeld sizing up Salma Hayek’s cleavage — it is a marathon of crazy. And that’s precisely the kind of distance running I can support. For instance, I have no idea why Heidi Klum is wearing a spandex dress that looks like a biology textbook diagram called, “STDs: Feel The Burn.” But judging by what she DID in that dress — and its matching tights — I suspect I need to get some Rosetta Stone and start watching online.