This dress was one of the big record-scratches of the night, back in 2012. The theme was Impossible Conversations, and it does feel like this dress is speaking in tongues. With itself. FOUR different patterns, a shoulder shield, AND a peplum? It is screaming, in gibberish, to try and win an argument with itself, and when she stands sideways…

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… her peplum looks like she’s selling snacks and ice cream at intermission from her tray.

But, times have evolved since 2012. People are mixing more patterns, trying more shapes, being bolder and louder. And there is something to appreciate about how NOT sheer it is. Whatever this is doing, resting on that hackneyed old crutch is not it.

I wouldn’t say that eight years of deepened wrinkles and a softened heart have made me love this on any of its own merits. But it IS interesting, and it is a big Met Gala swing — we didn’t know Elizabeth to be much of risky fashionista before this, I don’t think? — and it makes me grin more than it makes me gasp. I still haven’t decided how I’m going to vote in the poll I’m about to throw us to, though. Have you?

WELL? Have you?!?

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