Thank you so much for your patience. I know Fug Madness 2018 ended ages ago, but it just didn’t feel right to end the contest without our tribute video, so we held out until we could really put a damn bow on this thing. Can we really call Bella Thorne the winner if she didn’t get to end our music video? If a tree falls in the forest and there isn’t a star wipe on it, did it really happen? Etc.
It was a particularly saucy final four this year, with Emily Ratajkowski and Demi Lovato falling short to the fuggernauts that are Halsey and Bella Thorne. But when the final contest tipped off, one of those women surged to an early lead and never let it go. And we all knew that’s how it would go, deep in our hearts, but I have to tell you: The journey this year was especially delightful, and surprisingly void of Kardashians, even if the ending was the one we all knew in our souls would come.
With a full 84 percent of the vote, Bella took it, leaving Halsey to sit at home and wonder how she can ever win this thing if THAT campaign wasn’t enough. (And interestingly, she didn’t even put up as fierce a fight as Demi, who at least cut Bella’s vote total to 78 percent in the Final Four matchup.)
Congratulations, Bella. And it may BE a happy occasion for you, indeed, because out of all these people I think you wanted this the most. And I also wish for you that the Fug Madness crown has the same effect it did on Miley, Bieber, Hudgens, and even eventually Kim Kardashian: a break from the limelight and a better wardrobe.
Please enjoy the tribute. Once Kevin’s dueling jobs ended and he was finally able to sit down with it, he laid the whole thing out and started cutting, and then announced that he simply couldn’t live with the old standard def aspect ratio and would have to start over so he could update that. He was correct to do it. If only Intern George cared about his unpaid job so much.
Thank you so much for your patience, and for playing Fug Madness. We will be back again next year, Fates willing, to see who will dethrone Ms. Thorne — if anyone.