I am trying to have an open mind about RiRi’s statement dress here:
Because, see, I don’t want it to sound like Rihanna can’t win with me — for one thing, fearless people like her keep things interesting, and for another, I like a statement dress when I feel like the statement makes sense and/or is flattering. And for me, this one veers away from that and more into the territory of a student art project called, “Toilet Paisley: When Charmin Attacks.”
There was a distinct homemade flavor to a lot of what Rihanna wore over the weekend.
I think this is what every Rose Parade float would look like if it was held outside a fraternity house. In fact, if you told me this took place during an episode of Greek in which the KT house did an ode to ballet, clowns, and the rewards program at Hallmark stores.
Here, I am torn between the awesomeness of a Rihanna-Jon Bon Jovi union, and being afraid that she was lying on a bed of roses when she swallowed some bad medicine that shot down her groin in a blaze of glory — thus forcing me to live on a prayer that we will never say goodbye, and keeping the faith that he will lay his hands on her (in a HEALING way, people) until there is a miracle. But at least Jon Bon is wearing his standard-issue sleeveless leather vest, so no matter WHAT the recycled phone cords are doing decorating RiRi’s torso, at least all is well in the left half of this photo’s world.