From a distance, FKA Twigs’s head jewelry looks like an extremely fancy nasal cannula.

She has Resting Bored Face — this isn’t meant as an insult; we all have a resting face. Mine is Resting Mean Face, and I would happily trade her. But I think sometimes all the heavy eye makeup and adornments and such underline the Resting Bored Face. And then somehow it’s all I can see even though so much else is happening. Like, say, the elaborate back brace she’s employing. I don’t know. I don’t know. Wow, I just wrote that twice. Is my Outfit Fry really that bad already?

Here’s the thing: I want to find it cool, but part of me just thinks Donatella picked a dress she’d already made and threw a support garment over it that she bought on eBay.

I thought this was part of the dress, until I looked closely and realized it’s a tattoo. An impermanent one; she had it designed and transferred specially for this. (It’s based on “mental geometry,” she said, and it’s meant to evoke protection.) There is an industrial look to it that enhances the outfit and gives it more “Manus x Machina” cleverness.

But, at the end of the day, once she moved it was really just underwear with a train.

Body language experts: The headlines about the two of them at the Met were all about how their appearance was meant to quash rumors about a split, and they certainly played nice on the red carpet. I know they’re just walking to the event here, but does it not look for all the world like she’s storming ahead of him and they haven’t spoken in two weeks?

[Photo: Getty, Fame/Flynet]

Tags: FKA Twigs