You know it’s going to be quite a cocktail when the Vogue review mentions girded 19th-century hips and “open-toe satin wrestling boots” in the same sentence. Per usual, there’s some great embroidery mixed with silhouettes that will be hilariously weird when they deploy on the red carpet, and then some sheers that already DID get deployed this past weekend courtesy of Titane’s Agathe Rousselle:

She’s like a hybrid of tattooed singer-songwriter Julia Michaels and noted kook Noomi Rapace. And she’s giving this the right edge, with her styling, but… reader, I laughed. This dress is attempting so much yet achieving the least.

When she moves and it can fan out like this, then you can at least appreciate the workmanship in the skirt. Otherwise… it’s a design dumpster fire.

[Photos: Imaxtree, Shutterstock]