I have been staring at this dress for well over twenty minutes and it turns out it’s rendered me slightly speechless. I just…do not like it. I cannot think of someone who could wear it successfully. It is aggressively silly, like something a waitress would have to wear at a theme restaurant…and it’s ALSO bloomin’ Alexander McQueen, so it cost a fortune and cannot even be excused by saying, “oh, this sweet little thing!? I got it at the flea market. I think it’s vintage!” I have a tremendous tolerance for whimsy (truly) but I think we have reached my personal limit.