Let us be honest and frank with one another: Of all the women showing up places lately looking like they’ve started their own cult and named themselves High Priestess, Laura Dern likely runs the cult I want to join the most. First, you could ask her lots of questions about Twin Peaks. Second, she’d tell you secrets about Nic Cage, once you got to a certain level. Third, I feel like Reese Witherspoon would show up at meetings every now and then and you know Reese doesn’t show up anywhere without snacks. Finally, I look great in red. Sure, I have some notes about the beige bag, but it’s too soon in my journey to question the leader.