You could be excused for worrying that you’d struck your head on the toilet and woken up in the midst of a Whitesnake video.

Honestly, if it were Spandex, I would be concerned that’s what HEIDI thought happened. Even though America’s Got Talent’s aggressive commitment to weekly red carpets has been abandoned due to Covid, La Klum has not been holding back, and for that I bless her a thousand times. Look:

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I hope all of you had fun watching @agt ❤️

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I mean, if it was good enough for Regina George, then it’s good enough for Heidi (and Donatella Versace, who made it).

I’ll be honest, I can’t sit through this show, so I don’t know if they’re filming socially distantly, or keeping the panel apart and having the acts perform on Zoom, or if they filmed these portions pre-shutdown. But Heidi brought out the corsetry for them:

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We are ready @agt ❤️

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It’s like the Victoria’s Secret show by way of Ann Taylor.

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@agt TONIGHT ❤️

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I like the blazer. And the pants. Actually… this whole thing made me smile? I would never have put it together, and yada yada bras are not shirts etc., but she looks cute. Unless I’ve been hypnotized by the twirling.

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Back to work ❤️ LOVE my Job @zimmermann

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And look for her autobiography, Parachutes and Petticoats, coming soon to a bookstore near you.