There was no full photo that showed what the top half of this pose looked like, so I just have to share the madness with you thusly.

Unless this Top Model UK event was promoting a photo shoot challenge in which the models are asked to hold something between their knees — you know, lettuce, a remote control, a whimsical commemorative QEII bobblehead — then I am not totally sure this could have ended (or technically begun, since this is the bottom) in a way that’s even REMOTELY beneficial to a modeling competition. They need to at least PRETEND they’re teaching useful stuff, rather than, “Pretend your face is your left knee and Ryan Gosling is your right knee. Okay. MAKE OUT.”

Here’s how it all looked once Elle straightened out her legs.

She looks like the world’s fanciest gymnastics coach. Well, except for her shins, which look like tiny tanned Draculas, which themselves sound like something that would be in one of Stefon’s Weekend Update pieces. “If you’re foreign, or pale, then I’ve got the spot for you. New York’s hottest club is FANG. The latest success from lipstick cannibal and perennial nightlife doorstop Glam Stoker…” Also, can you tell Jessica and I just fell into YET ANOTHER Stefon wormhole? We talk about him a lot lately. But what can I say? Stefon is forever. Hopefully this outfit is not.

[Photos: Getty]