I’m sad for the Daytime Emmys. As if soaps didn’t already feel like the bastard stepchild of the entertainment world, now nobody will televise the show, and apparently the red carpet pre-show was an unholy nightmare. I miss the olden days, when every channel had three hours of soaps on every day, and Viki had split personalities on One Life To Live and Stuart Chandler was impersonating Adam, or vice versa, on All My Children. Or that time accidental castration on Passions, and even better, the drunken backward-reattachment surgery. Or that time Guiding Light cloned Reva, and everyone was like, “THAT IS SO STUPID WHO WOULD DO A CLONE STORY?” I hope Kim Zimmer sent Orphan Black’s Tatiana Maslany a bouquet of something that said, “YOU’RE WELCOME.”
Anyway. All of which is to say that I apparently hate change, and yet, here, I wish for it very much:
As in: CHANGE, KKL. CHANGE INTO ANYTHING YOU CAN FIND.
[Photo: Getty]
