Goz:
sup girl
Her Maj:
Hello, Mr. Gosling!
Goz:
u up
Her Maj:
Well, yes. So it would seem.
Her Maj:
As a matter of fact, you’re quite timely.
I’m entertaining my options for the premiere.
Her Maj:
What do you think, pants made of holiday wrap tubes,
or a skirt with the man in the moon
silk-screened over my, er, majesty?
Goz:
wut
Goz:
ur funny
Her Maj:
Ta very much.
I’ve actually found a fetching
canary number with
an X marks the spot
sort of feel. It’s Oscar de la Renta,
if you must know.
Goz:
cool cool. was gonna ask if ur taping greys anatomy
Goz:
but while im here should i try to match or what
Her Maj:
Certainly! That could be a lark.
Goz:
lark? thot u said canary?
Her Maj:
You’re a card, Mr. Gosling!
Goz:
wait what r u talking bout a cardinal now?
Goz:
wtf is up w you and birds
Her Maj:
Ah, well, in British slang I suppose I am one!
What are you trotting out for the night?
Goz:
green suit, shiny, its so good.
no yellow rn, but could change?
Goz:
oh wait ive got a yellow polo, can throw on under
Goz:
stylist might kill me but whatever, i won an oscar
Her Maj:
I don’t think you did, pet. Not yet.
Goz:
u sure
Her Maj:
Well for one thing it’s not in any
of our press materials,
or on the poster.
Goz:
just kidding id remember, probs. but close enough
Goz:
nobody counts affleck, dude sux
Her Maj:
Too right. Well, I shall see you tomorrow. Will Eva be there?
Goz:
who
Her Maj:
You are so delightfully dry!
Goz:
no rly who
Goz:
oh EVA, sorry, thot you said eva
Her Maj:
(…)
Goz:
k bye
Her Maj:
What do you mea — oh, we’re done?
Right, see you at the party, then.
Goz:
thx
