This happened last week, and we missed it. How can that be? We are, if nothing else, absurdly committed to the concept of Sexy Tootsie. We will not let go of Sexy Tootsie. How do we not have a kind of Sexy Tootsie radar where we hear a beep or a trumpet salute whenever a contender appears? Why has the universe not enabled our Alexas and our Siris to yell “SEXY TOOTSIE! LOOK ALIVE!” at us from across the room whenever we need to snap to? I don’t believe in manifesting, but maybe if I manifest a belief in manifesting, I can then use it to manifest that.

[Photo Craig Barritt/Getty Images for Bottega Veneta]