MARION: Oh, Penelope, tender treasure.

PENELOPE: Oh, Marion, ripest fruit of the land.

MARION: I am so glad I have you to help me through this.

PENELOPE: Yes, it can be nerve-wracking getting an award.

MARION: No no, I mean this. The Chanel.

PENELOPE: Ohhhh. Well–

MARION: Yes, welcome to HELL, am I right? So many terrible things. ‘She’s French, give her the balloon pants, she can do anything,’ ugh.

PENELOPE: About that–

MARION: But with you by my side, we can get through this period together and then be free. FREE.

PENELOPE: This is [mumbles].

MARION: Excuse me?

PENELOPE: I said… this is Versace.

MARION: …

PENELOPE: I’m so sorry! I’m still MOSTLY Chanel! I just made a call, and…

MARION: I am going to take this award and I am going to leave before I do something treasonous with it.

[Photos: Shutterstock]