JOAQUIN PHOENIX: Hello. I thought this event was last night. I decided just to stay in my outfit.
ROONEY MARA: Did you know that Joaquin Phoenix and I are dating? We are. We met on the set of this movie, where I play Mary Magdalene, and he plays Jesus.
CHIWETEL EJIOFOR: I know, everyone. I know. I know. Also, thank you, I do look handsome.
JP: Would you believe me if I told you that I was filming a movie wherein I play Sean Penn, and I’m Method? MAYBE I AM.
RM: I’m sure this movie is going to be A HOOT, you guys! Me, Joaquin Phoenix, crucifixion!
CE: Right. Am I allowed to go look at the rest of the paintings here at the National Gallery, yet? Not that I don’t love negotiating all of the rest of this, but…
[Photo: David Fisher/REX/Shutterstock]