I think the ESPYs may have had a tough time getting the very fullest complement of athletes due to a) the fact that the Stanley Cup JUST ended (usually this is in June), and b) the fact that all the Olympians are en route to or in Tokyo, and c) the fact that the NBA Finals are still going on (also usually in June). Hence, my big news here is, “Wait… is the bearded man THAT Matt James, or an athlete named Matt James whose existence I am only just discovering?” Nope. It’s that Matt James, hiding behind an ENORMOUS new facial topiary, and I guess he’s back with his The Bachelor choice. WHY must the toxic Bachelor stream cross into my love of sports? WHY, MATT JAMES? WHY.
Also herein: a few people who play the aforementioned sports, and our spelling bee champion.