HILARY SWANK: Alba.

JESSICA ALBA: Swanksy.

SWANK: We meet again.

ALBA: We’ve never met before. But we’re clearly soulmates. Look at our mirror-image hair styles.

SWANK: I’m glad anyone is willing to be my soulmate after that whole Chechian warlord debacle.

ALBA: You must be terrible at Google, though, seriously.

SWANK: I GET IT.

ALBA: But you look nice. Finally.

SWANK: What is that supposed to mean?

ALBA: Just that last time we saw you, you were wearing this. Also, you’ve been on like a ten year campaign to remind us all you have boobs. Talk about “I get it,” am I right?

SWANK: Wow, Jessica Alba, you are kinda harsh.

ALBA:  I call ‘em like I see ‘em, Swank. But you do look nice. Well done. FOR ONCE.

SWANK: You also look nice.

ALBA: I think you mean, I look GREAT.

SWANK:…I mean, you do. You do look great.

ALBA: Thanks! Smile pretty for the cameras, and then let’s pretend this never happened.