INTERN: Okay, I’ve sorted Ana de Armas for the L.A. premiere! We’ll give her the coatrack hips from season


INTERN: Archival laundry logos!

NG: No.

INTERN:… Well, no one wore the backpack shirt with the kite

NG: No!

INTERN: I suppose… the suspenders?


INTERN: We could try–

NG: Don’t even DARE suggest anything else from a runway show. We can’t send her that bullshit! She’s not on our F*ck Around and Find Out list!

INTERN: There’s a list?

NG: We have to send her something REAL. Something ACTUALLY GOOD.

*pushes red button on the desk; a gold glitter phone rises from within*

NG: Pick up the phone and say “By the power of Greyskull” three times.

INTERN: I… what?

NG: NO QUESTIONS. Say it, then hang up.

INTERN: And then?

NG: We wait. Salvation will be delivered on the wings of genius. Or, via FedEx, whichever is faster.

[Photos: Broadimage/Shutterstock ]