I’ve heard rumblings that of the Kardashians, Khloe is the one you want to hang out with, and I believe that. Certainly she’s the one I’d pick, because she’d have all the best gossip about her family, famous people, AND the NBA. That’s a twelve martini lunch right there.

But this outfit is not good. She looks like a casino hostess who spilled beer on her sternum. And I can’t even talk about the lips. Why would you want them to match your chin? It just doesn’t make sense, Khloe. Do you not want Lamar to be able to find them? But isn’t he your lobster? He HAS to be. I noticed on your Got Milk ad that your smiles are crooked on opposite sides, so when you make out, they will match. This feels like destiny. So please wipe off the invisibility gloss and get a little life in there, while I go put myself in time out for admitting any of the aforementioned about you and Lamar’s mouths.

[Photo: Getty]