“Hey Sally?”

“Yep?”

“I’m just packing up this dress to send… is it missing something?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s a sock.”

“No, it’s a dress.”

“Yeah, I guess, but it’s really…. it’s a giant tube. And that’s it.”

“You think it needs something? Can’t we FOR ONCE just ship someone a cheap tube and knock off early?”

“It just seems undercooked.”

“Fine. Uh. Hmm.”

“What about a belt?”

“No. Belts are done. It’s 2017. We’re eating carbs now. How about a corset. Oh, better, one of those underboob corsets that you see on pirate wenches.”

“Pirate wenches aren’t real…?”

“Sure they are. Just — here, cut up this leather jacket, it’s from last season anyway. Just take the sleeve and make it into a cummerbundy thing. Done.”

“Okay, but does it need a hint of…”

“Yes. It needs something. What does it need.”

“Color?”

“Nah.”

“Texture?”

“ACHOOOO. Oh, hey, THAT gives me an idea.”

[Photo: Getty]