Last time we saw Keira, we noted that she might be feeling….billow-y, and here it appears she is, shall we say, yet more billow-y. Billowy-ier. Billow-y, yet also vaguely prepared to walk through knee-high grass in the field of an English manor, as wrenchingly romantic music plays in the background and a handsome man with a perfect jaw watches longingly and berates himself for being so inept at expressing his pure and respectful, yet also very hot, love.

I’m not sure WHAT movie Julianne Moore is starring in…

Chanel Mademoiselle Privé exhibition, Shanghai, China - 18 Apr 2019

…but I’m concerned it’s weird, like the time my roommates and I thought we were renting Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down! but we actually rented The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, & Her Lover. SPOILER the latter is VERY VERY SURPRISING. How did we get those confused? Great question. More than twenty years later, I still have no idea. They’re both Miramax films? They’re both…foreign? They’ve both got nudity? I CANNOT ANSWER THIS, please stop harassing me!!

[Photos: Laomejin/ZCOOL HelloRF/REX/Shutterstock]