JAMIE CAMPBELL BOWER: I am SUPER EXCITED about my new endorsement deal!

BONNIE WRIGHT: It’s clearly not for hairbrushes.

JCB: What’s that, most precious flower of my love? My sweet little satin-wrapped schoolteacher-looking tartlet?

BW: Oh, nothing! Nothing! What are you endorsing?

JCB: Duh! FAUX TAN. They’re calling it GRINDELGLOW! It’s the Bronzer Favored By Grindelwald!

BW: I don’t remember Grindelwald being described as tan in the book…

JCB: No! But don’t you think, while he was off nursing his wounds from breaking up with Dumbledore-slash-maybe accidentally murdering someone, he TOTALLY went bumming around, like, Ibiza and stuff?

BW: I…thought he was off plotting all kinds of nefarious stuff and raising an army for world domination and acting as a kind of proto-Voldemort?

JCB: You can TOTALLY do that poolside!

BW: Our marriage is going to be really entertaining.