We’ve seen this feather-trimmed suit before when Alexa Chung wore it back in 2016, after Sienna Miller had donned its blue-and-green cousin. It is, charitably, not great. It looked like Muppet roadkill then, and I think the pants are turning out to be sheer:
It’s crazy to me that she got trendy Beauty & Essex to throw her a birthday party with a photo agency in the house, but didn’t get something hot off the fashion presses. I mean: Is it a bad sign that Posh, her boyfriend’s mom, didn’t send her anything for the big day? Speaking of which, what is even going on with Brooklyn here? Together they look like a child of the Upper East Side and the boyfriend her parents hate who thinks it’s sexy to smoke a pipe, and is one part Ryan Gosling in La La Land, one part mime, and two parts — here’s a reference for you – – the painfully drippy Cool Guy in Peggy Sue Got Married who she thinks is so deep and rebellious but who is actually an awful, awful poet.
That pile of cushions is actually her birthday cake. And…. I mean, her makeup looks good, and she isn’t wearing a choker, so that’s progress, right? Selfie it up, kids. You’re young and she can drink legally — he’s only 18 — and her hair is having a very good night. Who CARES if I think you look like a very cabaret act that missed the cut on The Voice. Enjoy yourselves!
Full marks to them, too, for showing off their B and C rings while smashing cake into his face. That’s some expert work right there.