It’s not even that this looks like it belongs to two different outfits, so much as, two different people.

The top is, like, a Lady Gaga for Hot Topic shirt — the type of thing she’d wear sans bra, with two dark Xs over her nipples (if we’re lucky). The bottom looks like the beginnings of Bjork’s Katy Perry Halloween costume. Red and pink can work, in some contexts, but the fabrics and brightness and texture are so divergent that they’re punching me in the nose. And I really value my sense of smell, so it’s not appreciated. Also: I don’t know what shoes DO go with this ensemble, but I’m pretty sure it’s not those; I’m guessing Emma was similarly flummoxed and so just went with something that might blend, but the result is more freaky than fashionable. Indeed, that could apply to the entire outfit. not least because I keep thinking her pelvis is waggling its twin tongues at me:

Seriously, I keep thinking she’s licking Mila up and down, which…actually,  for some people I might’ve just raised this dress in their estimation.

Tags: Emma Stone