Oh my god, you guys. This outfit.  This outfit of Melody Thornton’s. It’s so…It’s all…it’s…..

Listen, I can’t even show it to you face-forward until after the jump because of the Not Safe For Workitude of the whole thing. BEHOLD:




So many thoughts. On one hand, you wonder if she even knew this was sheer. On the other, she must have because guess what? If that is a dress which APPEARS opaque without the assistance of flashbulbs, it is also a dress with which you can easily wear a bra . And most women put on a bra before going to a party. I mean, I guess it depends on the party, but this is an Elle party, and Elle is a classy joint. Elle is not a “hey, check out my nips!” kind of establishment. It was not a party at Nude Nude Nudes, down by the airport (my favorite strip club in Los Angeles. I had never been inside, and they tore it down to make a PARKING LOT — they paved paradise, you guys — but I always appreciated how direct the name was. When the Pope visited LA like a hundred years ago, so as not to offend him on his commute, they changed the sign to read “Nudge Nudge Nudge,” which is ALSO a kind of good name for a strip club). Despite the fact that she LOOKS Nude Nude Nude, and I’m sure when everyone else at the party saw this, they nudge nudge nudged each other.

On the other hand, I guess her abs are enviably flat. But — and I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M ABOUT TO WRITE THIS — that, honey, is what a crop top is for.