The Southpaw promotional trail, winding through the ESPYs and whatnot, has been… curious.

That dress feels like she’s running out of steam and just wants to go home. And I am not sure Jake ever had any steam to run out of; at all these events, at least from what I’ve seen, she comes off like she’s trying to smile and manufacture some chemistry while he’s all but stroking his beard and musing, “Is Nietzsche right that objectivity is a fallacy? Did the notion of perfection create imperfection, or vice versa? What ARE numbers? Why is Fox Sports One in the 200s on DirecTV but Fox Sports Prime all the way up in the 600s? UNIVERSE, THY QUIRKS PLAGUE MY SLEEP.”

[Photo: Getty]