Look, I don’t know what you would wear to the opening of a new upscale seafood restaurant. But this is what Christina Milian wore:
According to the Daily Mail — I know — it was also her birthday, and that at least feels right, as this is a very close approximation of what my grandma would refer to as her birthday suit, i.e., nudity. (DMIK also informed me that this catsuit is available for the low price of $19.99, so at least we don’t all have to seriously consider flinging ourselves off a cliff, as we would do if it were, say, a $5400 Balmain offering.) I think my favorite part of this look, though, is not the quaint X Marks The Spot nipples tape — honestly, if you’re going to wear this, wear it, nips akimbo — but the sweatshirt. It looks like a zip-up she keeps in the back of the car because that’s where she tossed it one afternoon when it turned too warm to actually wear it home from the Grove. That sweatshirt wants no part of this. It wants no part of any of this.