Because I love an unexpected face-off, and you don’t usually think Beyonce and Natalie Portman will have much overlap in ANYTHING. I mean, even Benjamin Millepied (whom LaineyGossip always calls “Ballet K-Fed” and that’s always how I refer to him in my head) is basically the opposite of Jay Z.

Let’s start with Miss Portman and her Dior:

This is somehow both super boring and EXTREMELY elegant. Natalie looks nine feet tall, and fully grown-up, but not in a stuffy way. The bunching sleeves are a little distracting to me, but the earrings are a fab choice, and where normally I might whine about her needing a darker lip, the smoky eye and gentler lip actually don’t bother me. Overall, she looks like the walking embodiment of whatever perfume your mother wore that you always associate with her — mine wore, and wears, Chanel No. 5 — and the feeling you get when you remember being a kid and inhaling that scent that you could only ever describe as Time To Hit The Town. I can’t explain it any better than that. I came into writing this post thinking I was more on the “dull” side but I think I just talked — and sense-memory’d — myself into liking it a lot.

Next up: Beyonce.

beyonce vanity fair oscar party

I don’t think Beyonce does this stuff that well, I’ll be honest. Seriously, one of my favorite things she’s ever worn was actually a damn jumpsuit, because it was well-made and had a lot of personality, but also allowed her to give it some zing. Which you’d think this would have as well, a bit, but those shoes are confusing “zing” with “bling.” Mox that with the fact that HER dress is bunching in places beyond just the sleeves, and the limp unbrushed-looking hair, and… I am sure this is sacrilege and will infuriate those who love her, but I promise I’m not just mindlessly negging on her. I just feel like the actual number of times Beyonce full-on kills it on the red carpet are fewer and further between than they ought to be. In the battle of Major Music Stars Who Fancy Themselves Pop Royalty, I think J.Lo — for all her nakedness and bad lipstick sometimes — actually does a more indelible job playing the role. Man, I can’t believe I just gave J.Lo more points than Beyonce in the diva stakes, by the way. I’m sure I’ll regret that later.

But for right now, the only battle that counts is this one. Whose ensemble wins?

  • Queen Bey's (8%, 465 Votes)
  • Queen Amidala's (92%, 5,406 Votes)

Total Voters: 5,871

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[Photos: Getty]