I wish we had all been together in my living room during Olympic trials, and the events themselves, for the hilarrible discoveries of Nastia Liukin’s outfits. Nastia won all-around gold in Beijing 2008 (Shawn Johnson was the favorite, or at least the preordained Olympics Darling, and took silver; there was also a wacky situation with an event final where Nastia effectively tied a Chinese gymnast for gold on the bars but took silver because of a bananas picky tiebreaker, but I digress) and has taken over the commentary for NBC’s Olympics coverage. I don’t know if she’s trying to be the Tara and Johnny of the Summer Games — like, both of them rolled into one (even though technically they’re also in Tokyo doing… something) — or if she’s just always had lively taste. But a big part of the problem is, she’s usually on-camera while sitting, which cuts off many of these choices at the waist and therefore takes them from unusual to Whaaaaat?!? I am genuinely sorry that I don’t have shots of that, because you won’t get the full effect. But still. CHOICES WERE MADE. Like this Zimmermann, which you can also see embedded here, I hope:

 

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Close-up like this, you can see the details in the butterflies, and think, “Oh, that’s why she picked it, how fun.” But on TV, it was so overwhelming, not least because she was in a chair so we weren’t appreciating it as a swingy little dress (shown in the second photo above). It was less Butterfly Garden than Twee of Life.

She’s pretty hot for this Zimmermann collection, because another one made an appearance:

 

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Again I lament the lack of shot of her in the chair. From this angle, it’s all posh, polished purple, but when she was sitting down — and the bottoms were not at all the focus — it was just a screen full of Victorian Ghost. The runway shot gives you the clean front view and the second shot in Nastia’s gallery KIND OF helps you imagine what it was like, too. Amazing. It’s like… she’s picked some FASHION but never with an eye toward how it’s going to look during the moments when we actually see her.

Want more Zimmermann? You got it:

 

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I don’t even hate this (seen in full on slide 2), but again, not thoughtfully chosen given her situation. If they’d let her commentate on the gymnastics while standing in front of a giant screen, like she’s Julie Chen hosting the Big Brother live show, then maybe! I mean, those shoes are fantastic! But. BUT. She’s a chair jockey at her job and the outfits aren’t shown to their best advantage.

 

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I don’t even know what this outfit is. A hideous leotard and a valance? Believable.

However, there is good news:

 

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I love everything about this. A lesser instinct would have gone with plain white pumps, but she stuck the damn dismount with those shoes. Now THAT is gold-medal work.