Several things:

A)  WHY IS THIS STILL HAPPENING? This Lace Over Undies trend should have lived for like two minutes — like those two minutes when people decided to wear socks with their heels, or those two minutes when people were like, “I AM going to wear this formal crop top. Wait, no. I’m not.” AND YET HERE WE ARE. I mean, of all the recent Lace Over Undies ensembles, this is…not the most terrible? That doesn’t make it not ridiculous, though. Espec since Eva is old enough to have done this the first time, in the 90s, as a body suit paired with high-waisted, light-washed denim and a kicky vest. Learn from your old photo albums, Eva.

B) Apparently, Eva Longoria wore this out on a date with Mark Sanchez, who she’s been seeing lately. How did I not know this was happening? Is this because I’ve been hoarding my US Weeklys in preparation for our flight to Fashion Week tomorrow? I get three weeks behind on Celebrity Gossip and look what happens. A TV actress hooks up with a quarterback and I don’t even know about it.