It’s not even that this is as heinous as some of Fab’s past creations.

I just think it’d be such a shame if she went through with her plan to become a fifth sister-wife. For one thing, we’d miss her — methinks the compound will frown on all her sheers — and for another, and this is more important, she’s always going to be last in line for the good bathtub gin. Still, if Big Love is any indication, at least she’ll have plenty of time to sit around on rocking chairs, plotting the best way to poison somebody and doing more crafty things to her feet:

Seriously, those aren’t shoes, they’re origami.