We have a lot of special entrants this week, and then a flurry of hotness at the end thanks to an injection of Taye Diggs. Yes, Taye Diggs and Lemond Bishop in the same hour of TV. We may all short-circuit. Number Five will be SUPER alive.
13. Lorraine Joy
What The Good Wife does best is callbacks. The rotating cabal of familiar faces is like a delightful little basket of Easter eggs if you watch the show, but if you don’t, it’s never off-putting — the characters always hold their own in each individual hour. This week, it was Polly Draper’s Lorraine Joy:
Lorraine got mired in the Case of the Week: some ChumHum deposition about the coders and the blah and the zzz. Last season, we learned Lorraine interviewed Alicia when she was trying to find employment after the Peter scandal, and Lorraine basically brought her in on false pretenses and was super insensitive. And if there’s one thing we’ve learned on The Good Wife it’s that you do not put Saint Alicia in the corner. She’s like the wind, and you can’t marginalize the wind. So when she showed up to go against Alicia in a deposition about ChumHum, this was the figurative chain around her neck (the literal one being… the one you see; this show is really into gigantic jewelry right now).
And let’s be real: There’s no way a woman dipped in high-waisted beige is going to best Alicia Florrick.
12. The Witnesses
Kalinda wants to interview the three people Cary spoke to on the recording, who agree that Cary gave them purely hypothetical advice. The dude on the left is the witness Diane wants on the stand. He is also the one Lemond Bishop kills for being the police informant, so R.I.P., short-lived friend. Unfortunately, Lemond guessed wrong (the guilty party: the one in the middle, who is also second in command). So basically, these gentlemen are sitting ducks.
11. Carey Zepps
The Other Car(e)y assists Alicia with the ChumHum deposition because the wife of the founder wants to think a guy is in charge, or something. This notion is met with all the eye rolls one might imagine, but all Carey has to do is be Meat in a Suit: lean over and whisper in Alicia’s ear occasionally and then give supportive nods. He embraces this — he whispers, “This is me whispering in your ear” — and it’s refreshing that he’s completely content in his occasional role as Suit Meat.
10. Valerie Jarrett
You may remember Valerie from being an advisor to the president. The actual president, not a fake one. The boost she gets: Everyone’s dialogue is like, “VALERIE JARRETT? YOU MEAN THE VALERIE JARRETT OF THE WHITE HOUSE?” The down side: Even the show doesn’t seem to know exactly what her title is, other than White House Valerie Jarrett, and she plays Eli’s patsy, allowing herself to be manipulated into playing the gender card in encouraging Alicia to run for State’s Attorney. She does a bad job of this, in the show and in the acting — the latter not being her fault; this isn’t her trade — and let’s face it, the neckline on that suit is just waiting for someone to screw in an astronaut’s helmet, old-school NASA style.
9. Cary
Yes, Cary is still in prison. And the tape of him talking to Lemond Bishop’s men does indeed sound like he’s giving them shady advice, but he says the tape has been edited, and that he was discussing it purely hypothetically. Which… they’re acting like that’s absolution for him, and in the technical sense it is, but Cary is no fool. He had to know why they were asking. Unless I guess he was backed into a Corner of Danger and trading in what-ifs was his only way out. Otherwise, doesn’t discussing hypothetical drug-running scenarios with known dealers make him AT THE VERY LEAST guilty of The Stupids?
But, from prison, he correctly advises Alicia on how to navigate the ChumHum deposition…
… and then gets OUT of prison, thanks to some strokes of corporate luck that put Florrick Agos in sweet financial straits (more on that later). That kid is about to have the best Diet Coke of his life.
However, Cary votes AGAINST the aforementioned strokes of corporate luck, so the poor guy vacates the pokey thanks to the spoils of a move he didn’t support. It’s like that one song in Team America: World Police always says: Freedom isn’t free. And also, Ben Affleck really was bad in Pearl Harbor. Cary has been in JAIL and his hair is better than those highlights.
8. Kalinda
She chases her tail most of the episode. But she figures out the identity of the C.I. who’s selling out Cary and spying on Lemond Bishop, and when she tactfully tells him that he can’t keep killing people or else Cary will have no witnesses in his favor, Bishop hits her with a gnarly moral dilemma. Either she tells him which one the C.I. is, or people might keep dying. Lemond Bishop is an evil genius and basically if he weren’t really dangerous and full of homicide, I’d encourage Kalinda to tap that, and… since he’s fictional, I still might. SOMEBODY tap it. Tap it like a keg.
7. Eli
“No, Alicia, it wasn’t me who tried to manipulate you into running (yes it was) and failed at it (OR DID I). I would never do it (except I totally did) and I totally hear you (nope) when you say over and over and over and over, less convincingly each time, that you do not want to be in politics (you would look so good on a poster).”
6. Alicia
Who wears the worst outfit in this entire episode?
Thank you, Alicia. You may sit down now. No, really. Find a table and sink that adjustable chair nice and low and sit down in it firmly until no one can see the tire marks from the chalk delivery truck that ran over your midsection.
Not a fan of her boring beige, either. This deposition was a face-off between sleepy neutrals. Alicia won. She also bested Cary in her corporate chess game: Diane Lockhart is coming to the company as a partner, and bringing a whole mess of other help. And despite legal roadblocks with Cary’s bail, she manages to get him out, too. It’s a way more productive week for her, capped with the addition of some SERIOUS A-GRADE EYE CANDY to her firm. We’ll get there. Patience.
I hate when Alicia THINKS she is being autonomous but actually is under the thrall of an overlord. In this case, Eli has totally crawled into her head (although he is NOT responsible for the donor who walked into Florrick Agos and tried to pay Cary’s bail, as a potential bribe for if/when she runs, although it piqued his interest). She BELIEVES she is not interested in running, but you can tell her resolve is crumbling, which… ugh. ALICIA. You do not want to be in any way under Peter’s thumb, personally OR professionally.
I am not feeling Alicia’s wardrobe at all in this episode. Has that ever happened before? This whole thing feels like Ann Taylor Loft’s little-known secondary outlet.
She did, however, find herself a kick-ass wine cardigan for this confrontation with Peter (she is not drinking any in this scene, but we all know Alicia; if it wasn’t nearby, it happened after he left). She and Olivia Pope could sweater the shit out of each other’s personal crises. They should get together for a weekly podcast. Call it… Blabernet Sauvignon.
Anyway: Alicia wants to take out a second mortgage on her condo to pay for Cary’s bail, but Peter has to co-sign it, and he refuses. She is enraged, although… Alicia, I know we don’t really enjoy your children, but they do still need a ROOF over their heads, and if you lose the condo, it will make it MUCH easier for Jackie to judge you when she pops up to make unwanted casseroles. She spits at Peter that the man she married would’ve done this, to which Peter responds, brimming with disdain, “The woman I married never would’ve asked.” I don’t know if that’s because he thinks he married a doormat, or because he just thinks her judgment is off, but it’s cold. If he were the Authentic Weather App, the forecast would read F’ing Freezing With A Strong Chance of Goddammit.
She does, however, get Cary out of jail: ChumHum gives them a big advance on something-something because Alicia got a settlement in their case. I’m not giving her the only credit for that because Cary gave her a lot of assistance from prison on that one, so he deserves partial.
ALSO I just added in this pantsuit, like five hours after the recap went up, because I accidentally forgot it. The whole feel is so weirdly military from her. If the idea was that she’s been the field general with Cary gone, then… it’s a tad literal.
5. Peter
Peter skips ahead of Alicia just because he put the financial kibosh on her. He didn’t do that much else, but that one thing was enough — well, that, and not wearing a blazer from White House, Michelin Market.
4. Diane
“Oh, you have an Entry Level Cartier, Ms. Middleton?” Diane thought to herself, checking the time for no reason. “Isn’t that darling.”
Diane garbed herself in full animal print the climactic scene in which she bolts the old Lockhart Gardner offices. Because she’s off-reservation now. She’s in the wild. All those gazelles leaping around had better look out.
Diane spends too much time in this suit. It’s not my favorite. It’s what you wear to a rehearsal dinner when you’re not wild about the guy your kid is marrying.
See what I mean about the giant thick chain necklaces, though? She’s two-for-two this season.
Diane is trying to convince Taye Diggs to ditch Lockhart Gardner Canning — where she recruited him — and come to Florrick Agos with her. She makes it sound so easy to just pick up and go. Is it? Can you play musical lawyers that much without consequences? Come to think of it, Christine Baranski and Taye Diggs could play ACTUAL musical lawyers. The David Lee number in that show will be spectacular. It’ll be called “Isn’t It Sardonic,” and Alanis Morissette will supply incorrect lyrics that are actually about sarcasm.
I feel like they put all of this week’s Diane Lockhart costuming energies into the last scene, where she leaves the office for the last time. This is fine, and sleek, but nobody is making sure we see it.
And that might even be dowdy, even if the color is lively. But in terms of ACTUAL power, Diane gets exactly what she wants this week and then some — well, outside the courtroom, anyway — so maybe she decided not to rub it in by also wearing the grooviest of suits. It’s nice of her. I’m already keenly aware that I will never be Diane Lockhart; I don’t need sartorial reminders EVERY time.
3. Finn
When he is en fuego, he puts on his best red-hot tie and slathers everyone with some whipped legal science. He successfully connects the dots between Cary’s bail money — put up by An Extremely Legitimate Business Owner — and Lemond Bishop, pointing out that this Extremely Legitimate Business has a gym-membership roster full of dead people (I don’t know why that’s a problem; when I’m dead is the only way I’ll have time for all that). This makes Cary’s bail money look suspect and means they won’t accept it until they put Lemond on the stand, which, in turn, means Lemond’s proxy yanks the offer of cash. It was good lawyering from Finn that caught Diane off-guard, which doesn’t happen often. Points to you sir.
Finn’s hot streak did abate a little when he figured out that their Lemond Bishop informant is the only person from that taped conversation not Diane’s witness list — ergo, that Lemond’s representation, at least, knows who he is. Mr. Polmar here is pretty sure it’s going to ruin years of work, and/or that this dude will end up wicked dead.
If Alicia runs for State’s Attorney and wins, that would make her Finn’s boss. Which means it could be Naughty Time. Listen, I know it’s immature that all I want is naked heat on this thing. But The Good Wife is FULL of attractive people who have chemistry with each other and yet almost never scratch the itch. Which is too bad, because when they do… Remember how hot Will and Alicia were? Yeah. Finn took awhile to grow on me, but there’s a lot of electricity with him and Alicia in this storyline, and that is basically the quickest way to suck me in, because I’m easy.
2. Lemond Bishop
He comes up with bail money for Cary; he then makes it vanish. He kills people wantonly just in case they’re blabbing, then he puts their fates on Kalinda’s conscience. He runs the show right now. I’m bumping him down the list for guessing wrong on the confidential informant and then having to admit that he still doesn’t know who it is. But otherwise, he’s got a pretty large deck of cards in his dapper hands.
And he does it all while wearing precision ties and bright shirts, watching his kid’s soccer games, or picking him up from school. I will say this: In the first two episodes, the show has overplayed slightly the whole Lemond Bishop Is Super Dangerous And Yet Look He’s Also A Regular Dad. It seems like their crutch where he is concerned. We know his duality by now. And the thing is, we don’t even NEED to like him, because we like Alicia, and Cary, and Diane, and so we know they need his legitimate business to thrive even if that means his illegitimate dealings also must, and we ride along on that uncertain train with them. He doesn’t NEED to also have a heart of gold to go along with his blooming pocket squares.
Although they don’t hurt.
1. Taye Diggs
Taye is not best pleased to learn Diane, who brought him to Lockhart Gardner Canning, is retiring. He’s even less enthralled when she reveals it’s to move to Florrick Agos, the toddler of law firms.
He crabbily endures an elevator ride with the local homeless man they allow to sponge-bathe himself in their office bathroom, doesn’t seem to care for the fact that the offices are under construction, and has a whole conversation with Robin in which she comes off faintly insane and he reeks of disdain for the whole operation. I’m concerned Taye is going to be humorless on this show. If you talk to Robin and you are not charmed, you are a burnt-out husk of a human being.
However, Diane sucks him in, and by the end of the hour he’s agreed to come to Florrick Agos, along with a whole mess of other personnel that she did not invite. Do they even know he can PAY them? Do they care? Is there even office space? Eh, nobody minds. Because he is the Pied Piper of legal employees. All he has to do is blow that whistle and people will be like, “Holy shit, Taye Diggs is playing wind instruments, for FREE. LET’S GO.” And for that he is in the top slot. He and Lemond Bishop should have a suit-off… and honestly, you can interpret THAT however you please.
