GFY Glossary

Did you ever wonder where some of the parodies originated, or stumble upon a word we use that some of Fug Nation seems to know but you don’t? We are here for you with this handy guide to GFY speak — which is very much a work in progress, so please, check back here as needed, and if what you’re looking for is missing then please let us know.

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BEC: Short for “Bitch Eating Crackers.” This is a term used to describe a person whose mere visage irritates you so much, for reasons real or unknowable, that you would be profoundly annoyed and put-off by even something as innocuous as the sight of that person eating crackers. We did not invent this term.

Boobs Legsly: A nickname for Blake Lively, originating from the period of time when Blake would go out of the house wearing cleavtacular outfits that also showed a lot of leg, in opposition to the traditional advice to show either boobs or legs but not both (like so). As of this writing, she seems to have reined in this habit, but she also proudly does not use a stylist, so anything could happen.

Bootaloons: 1) Boots that come so high up the thigh that they might as well be pants — and are often deployed as such; 2) a boots/pants combination that APPEARS as though it’s pants that have boots on the end, like footie pajamas. A garment we have yet to see for REAL in the wild, but the prospect of it looms terrifying.

Britney Spears: See GFY Britney.

Bull true: a terrible line from Country Strong, which became a Fug favorite after we wrote a recap of that fromage-fest.

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Carte Blanchett: a play on the phrase “carte blanche” — which Merriam-Webster defines as “permission to do something in any way you choose to do it” — originally coined on Twitter by brilliant Fug National @thelemonofpink, meaning that we tend to give Cate Blanchett a lot of leeway in the crazy stuff she wears because she can pull off crazy more often than other people, because she’s Cate Blanchett. First used in this post.

Celebrity Shoe Intervention with Uzo Aduba: We have a long-running joke, based on Uzo Aduba’s regular good taste in footwear, that someone needs to greenlight a reality show called Celebrity Shoe Intervention with Uzo Aduba wherein she shows up and rescues them from themselves.

Stockholm Syndrome: the effect through which, after continued persistence or exposure, we eventually come to love somebody or their style that we previously did not. A good example is Chloe Sevigny, whose clothes mostly exasperated us — the media’s absurd booty-smooching of her alleged elevated sense of fashion drove us mental, and was one of the many things that spurred this site’s existence — until she was so awesome on Big Love and everything thereafter, which made her relentless nuttery seem so much more tolerably amusing. Others: Solange Knowles, Bai Ling.

Cougar Town-ing: Our term for when you sample a show by only watch the snippet  that your DVR accidentally records after another show. For example, when Cougar Town was on after Modern Family, we watched the first two Cougars and didn’t like them; thereafter, we checked in on it only by watching the 30 seconds of it that always ended up on the tail end of the Modern Family recording. And those 30 seconds were always enough to convince us that we were correct in never watching any more than that. Can be spelled “cougartowning” or “CougarTowning” or however you like. Sample usage: “I have been Cougar Town-ing Sean Saves The World and it makes my brain want to escape through my ear.”

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Daily Mail (I Know) or DMIK: This is Fug Nation’s shorthand way to acknowledge that we’re aware the Daily Mail is not an unimpeachable, intellectual (or particularly) classy source of information. (That we nonetheless read.) For example, “I read in the DMIK that Kate and Wills spent all weekend choreographing interpretative dance routines to the Spice Girls.”

Drunkface: This began as a nickname for AnnaLynne McCord (the 90210 reboot), who looks totally normal in motion but used to look hammered in her photos, be they red-carpet or promotional or otherwise. She more or less cured that, but the name stuck, and can now be applied to any person who looks artificially, actually, or avoidably (as on a magazine or poster) sloshed.

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Entry Level Cartier: A beloved Fug National, whose name was inspired by a story that came out about a new watch belonging to Kate Middleton, which was snootily referred to in said article as “very much an entry level Cartier.” It’s considered the apex of the Kate Effect — i.e., when you start buying things because Kate has them. (Like Corkswoons) — if you crack and buy an Entry Level Cartier.

Ellipsis dress: an outfit which inspires speechlessness or a particular ineloquence, as in, “That’s… I can’t… But maybe? But… What is… Hmm.”

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Fetch: See “Make Fetch Happen.”

Fictional English Mini-Series: Born out of a post where Helena Bonham Carter wore a hat that made her look like a “somewhat barmy but wickedly fun hostess at a weekend-long house party in the English countryside in the 30s,” this is an imaginary book/mini-series which has grown to include a variety of celebrities and incredibly detailed plot twists and turns including Hitler, time travel, and Benedict Cumberbatch’s character nobly sacrificing his own life in a fire.

Fug/Fugly: We have a FAQ page for this one, but it belongs here, too. Basically, if you learned this word in college, you probably heard it as a contraction of “f**king ugly.” We prefer “fantastically ugly,” for sanitized purposes, and we define it as a self-inflicted state: the often terrible things celebrities adorn themselves with, or other flagrant crimes they commit against their DNA, in the name of fashion and beauty.

Fug the Fromage: Our term for recapping deliciously cheesy movies or made-for-TV movies. Here is a link to the archive.

Fug Madness: our annual bracketology contest, held concurrently with March Madness, in which Fug Nation votes to determine the year’s fugliest celeb. Learn more at the Fug Madness FAQ, and relieve past Madnesses at the Fug Madness Wall of Fame.

Fug Nation: The devastatingly attractive and brilliant community of Go Fug Yourself readers. We dedicated our first YA novel, Spoiled, to Fug Nation.

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Get-A-Grip Friend: This is exactly what it sounds like, as in, a person in your entourage who is not afraid to take you by the shoulders, look you in the eyes, and say, “You have lost your mind and nobody should wear a meat dress, ever, you bacteria-courting crackpot.” Seen in our first novel, SPOILED, as well as our second, MESSY, but first used by Jessica in conversation many years ago. The first usage on GFY — we think — was in this 2008 post about (aptly) The Hills.

GFY Britney: Remember that famous “Letter of Truth” she wrote, years ago? And its progeny? So do we. And on the occasions that we do feature Britney, we like to touch back on that memory, because it was a great one from a simpler time. Seriously, does no one write letters of truth anymore? Are they Tweets of Truth now? E-mails of Truth? It’s a lost art… but we will keep it on life support. Because in our minds, Britney is always and forever not a girl but not yet a woman, waiting for Justin. The Broadway play, in fact, will be called Waiting For Justin, and will be set on a bench outside Starbucks.

GFY J.Lo: The parody was borne of the “Jenny From The Block”-era J.Lo who was trying so hard to convince the world that she was regular despite all evidence to the contrary (much of which she helpfully explained to us through song). In other words, a somewhat deluded and self-impressed J.Lo. Then she married Marc Anthony and suddenly decided she was going to become a Spanish-language sensation, but it seemed so abrupt and inorganic that we tried to make her come across that way too. It worked for a while but became a bit dated and confusing, so we pared it down to merely a J.Lo who is self-absorbed, certain she is all things to all people, deeply obsessed with Ben Affleck and the fact that he dared to have a life and career after their breakup, and not all that fussed if she gets anyone else’s names or information correct because whatever, they’re boring. Her “Hola Lovers” salutation comes from actual tweets by Jennifer Lopez, and was, in fact, her second-ever tweet.

GFY Kanye: Our faux-Mr. West came from back when he blogged, rather than Tweeted, and did so almost exclusively in all-caps. Of course, now his occasional Twitter rants are also in that style, so it needs less explanation. We have him rhyming a lot because, well, rhyming is fun — it’s the idea that GFY Kanye fancies himself such an artistic force that he’s constantly trying to think in lyrics, which we feel like Actual Kanye probably wants us to think is true anyway.

GFY Karl: There may BE no explaining this parody. It’s our version of Karl Lagerfeld, and it is purely interpretive.

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Hilarrible: A mash-up of “hilarious” and “terrible.”

Hola Lovers: a salutation that Real Jennifer Lopez has used on her Twitter feed, which we naturally appropriated as part of our parody. For more, see GFY J.Lo.

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Imanity: Much like with Carte/Cate Blanchett, we realized Iman has a deep power within her to look wonderful in stuff that you wouldn’t imagine working. So “imanity” = Iman + immunity.

Intern George: If you have ever wondered how we happened upon the conceit that George Clooney is our intern — he never comes to work — here is the origin story. Longtime readers also remember that George used to answer our mail – with hugs, primarily — but we don’t get as much hilarious/hate mail as we used to (which is fine; please don’t send us any), giving George even MORE time to flarg around Lake Como drinking Aperol Spritzes and not earning his non-existent college credit.

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Jennifer Lopez: See GFY J.Lo.

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Kanye West: See GFY Kanye.

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LAMB Syndrome: the disease that causes a celebrity to wear something that demands, “Look At My Bra.” We do love a syndrome.

Lohan Syndrome: the condition of being a child star who goes totally, willfully, wastefully off the rails. As in, “Gee, those Fanning sisters sure have avoided Lohan Syndrome.”

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“Make fetch happen”: In Mean Girls, Gretchen Wieners (Lacey Chabert) keeps using the word “fetch” as an adjective, and Rachel McAdams’ Regina George finally turns to her and snaps and says, “Stop trying to make ‘fetch’ happen. It’s NEVER going to happen.” We respectfully cite that glorious moment to describe either: a celebrity who seems to be trying really hard, possibly in vain, to become A Big Deal. It can also be applied to particular trends that are being pushed but not catching on, or really to any situation in which fruitless efforts are being exerted with cheerful repetition.

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NAB: an acronym for Needs A Bracelet.

NABB: an acronym for Needs A Better Bracelet.

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Pacey: Joshua Jackson’s role on Dawson’s Creek, on which he was often the only character we didn’t want to drown in said creek. Pacey Witter was a snarky, swoon-y delight, and it is possible that poor Josh Jackson will be referred to as “Pacey” for the rest of his (or, at least, our) life, we loved him so. See also: people who mostly refer to Matthew Perry as “Chandler.” We might be those people as well.

Pantalunacy: the deployment of pants that defies reason and logic and aesthetics.

PANTS WHAT: Similar to pantalunacy, but an expression of bewilderment brought on by insane attire that robs us of coherent thought. Can be adapted to “SHIRT WHAT” and “SHOES WHAT,” etc.

Peldon, Blonde and Brown: Also known as Courtney Peldon and Ashley Peldon, respectively, these sisters were the original inexplicable invited guests with noteworthy bad taste. They were red-carpet staples at the time of this site’s founding, in 2004, despite boasting very few recognizable credits, and they never wasted an opportunity to look mad as pants. They’ve since faded away after Brown attempted a career as a perfumer, and we hear Courtney — who once dated Crispin Glover, a.k.a. George McFly — now works as a talent agent. Their archive is a treasure, and a relic of a more terrible, wonderful time; here are some other pictures, posted in celebration of our 10,000th post (scroll past the book stuff to see them).

piano picture: This refers to any particularly cool, memorable, beautiful, or funny photograph that we imagine the celebrity subject then frames and sticks on their Baby Grand for posterity. It derives from our exhaustive royals coverage — particularly of Will and Kate, and their various exotic adventures abroad (I almost wrote “erotic” and actually I suspect that is true also). Examples: W&K at Uluru, or this classic of her with George, of which she is rumored to have obtained a copy (although this one of Wills kissing George’s head is great too).

pizza: One day, worn out from discussing the nuances of naked dresses — or The Sheers — we decided to discuss pizza instead. It’s become a kind of code, or even a safe word, for dresses that insist on prolonging that tiresome trend.

polterwang: a term for that time when a lady’s clothes bunch and pull so unattractively that it goes beyond Ye Olde Cameltoe, and gives the impression of a phantom man-package.

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Rapid Beaver: a typo that became a nickname for Sharon Stone. Jessica was trying to use the phrase “rabid beaver” to describe her outfit, but the typo was funny enough that it stuck.

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Scrolldown fug: when an outfit (or an entire look) starts out fine, and then deteriorates the further down you go. Here is one example, although we have a whole archive of them as well.

Stabby: Our term for when we’re feeling a little ragey and fed up and… well, stabby. Example usage: The Americans getting no major Emmy nominations for its first season makes me SO STABBY.

SWINTON: our nickname for the estimable, formidable Tilda — caps required. It started with a seat at a Lacoste show at Fashion Week marked only “SWINTON,” and even though she did not show up and sit in it, we decided it is the only proper way to refer to her. Hell, maybe the seat even belonged to some other Swinton, but to us there is no other, and so SWINTON she will always be. Auto-correct wants us to change it to “WINTON,” by the way, as if THAT makes any sense. Auto-correct has no respect.

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Tami Taylor: our occasional name for actress Connie Britton, after the beloved and memorable name of her Friday Night Lights character.

“THE PATTERN IS BABIES.”: A phrase we sometimes use for when we cannot quite believe our eyes (for lack of a better explanation). It originated with a Gucci dress worn at the 2016 Emmys, which… y’all, the pattern really IS babies. Someone in the comments joked — or not — that they’d enjoy it if that became a general exclamation of incredulity, and so a glossary entry was born.

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Uterine Secret: Our little epithet for whether someone is hiding a pregnancy.

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WAG: A term we did not make up, but which we use, to refer to the wives-and-girlfriends of English footballers, who hang together while their husbands play. Posh was of course the biggest and the best WAG there was.

Widow Longoria, The: Eva Longoria’s first major appearance after her split from Tony Parker involved a tremendously glum black frock, prompting us to dub the newly single actress “The Widow Longoria.” It has stuck.

Wine Cardigan: Inspired by Olivia Pope on Scandal, a wine cardigan is a large cosy wrap one wears while drinking and a) quietly suffering; b) drunk-dialing your illicit lover; c) drunk-dialing your parents; d) drunk-dialing some other dude who won’t ever really take the place of your illicit lover; e) plotting; f) staring into middle distance vacantly.

Words/WORDS: When Jessica writes her posts, she uses “words words words” as a place-holder for the copy when she is placing the art. For years, she worried that eventually she would screw up and accidentally publish a post that merely said, “WORDS.” Of course, this eventually did happen (and then happened AGAIN and we left it as proof), and now “words” or its even more irritated compadre, “WORDS,” is GFY slang for, “This is so terrible that I can’t even say anything about it.”

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