“YO AMERICA.”
“CHECK OUT THIS &^$*ING RED SUIT. I AM A VISION OF PRECISION SO HOLD YOUR DERISION WHILE I MAKE AN INCISION IN YOUR %&*^$&ING TELEVISION LIKE PERFORMING A CIRCUMCISION WITH NUCLEAR FISSION SOMETHING-SOMETHING GEICO LONG DIVISION. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST: PROFESSOR PLUM DID IT IN THE CONSERVATORY WITH MISS SCARLEtT AND HE KNOCKED HER UP WITH MY $*&^%ing SUIT, YOU O&$^ING DIG? BUT NO I’M REALLY HERE TO MAKE SURE THAT, A YEAR LATER, YOU ARE ALL STILL %*&%^ING TALKING ABOUT ME AND TAYLOR %*(&$^ING SWIFT WHO HAS A GIFT THAT I GAVE SHORT SHRIFT AFTER I RIFFED ABOUT BEYONCE GOT STIFFED AND IF YOU SHOP WITH ANY THRIFT BUY GEICO FOR YOUR FORK-LIFT. AND I HOPE THAT AFTER THIS $*&^ING BROADCAST, AND THIS #$%$^ING SENSITIVE RAP, WE CAN ALL %*$^ING FORGIVE EACH OTHER AND %*&$^ING MOVE THE %*&^ ON BECAUSE I %(^&ING HAVE TO GO BUY THROW-PILLOWS AND ##%ING 3(#*^-SWINGS AND SOME *^$&*^ i&*^()%i&ERY AND DON’T FORGET THE (#%*(& SALAMI ICED WITH *$#&*^$ GEICO (%$^)s^ CHEESE FACTORY &%$#*^)^ )(@#*#()%$_^ ()#e%^$)%_^ TOE-JAM. DID YOU GET ALL THAT? YEAH, I THOUGHT SO.”
