I forgot about the Venice Film Festival. How have I not figured out a way to get myself sent there? Jessica, I need to, uh, research how to get on and off boats in couture. Thanks.
Anyway, Naomi Watts arrived; she is a juror, although the official Venice Film Fest website claims she is “the English actress,” which they might want to edit. (Side note: Taika Waititi is also on the jury, which means we’ll get some action on that front soon. Hello, Afternoon Man.) She popped by in a casual Armani frock wit all white accessories, and I’m pretty into it, I must admit. While it’s crazy to think an outfit this carefully casual has cost what it surely did, there is something so much more relatable to me about rolling up — and then I guess sailing up — in a hat and a blazer and shades and a gigantic purse, and sneakers, because it suggests to me that Naomi Watts is at heart fairly practical and understands that there is zero need to arrive in town early and do this:
Indeed, if Naomi Watts had shown up and done that, we would have wondered if she accidentally ingested canal water.
This lady is Izabel Goulart, a model who is engaged to a German footballer and who frequently shows up in Cannes. She’s sporting a Philosophy… well, I was going to say dress, but it’s really a Philosophy suggestion. It is, itself, an existentialist theory. When is a dress a dress, and when is it a window? Gosh, Kant and Descartes will be just so ticked off that they didn’t live long enough to blow the froth off a couple cold ones and discuss whether labeling it a dress is a priori or aposteriori; whether it simply thinks, therefore it is. Meanwhile, to me it mostly suggests a yearning to make lingerie for ruff fetishists. Mayhap I’m too snarky for philosophy, and, indeed, for Philosophy.