This preliminary event at Miss Universe apparently happened last weekend, but I was so up in Thanksgiving’s grill at that point — lists and lists, and did I mention lists? — that I didn’t know it. Fortunately, Fug Nation is both forgiving, and never one to pass up on the chance to ogle giant costumes.

I watched the archived feed, which was a MAGICAL EXPERIENCE, because the two hosts each read a detail about the costume and then finished off with the most inept rhyming couplet (something I gather they have done in other years, also?). “Before you really bash the rhymes, you should know all the contestants DID ask for them,” the male host said. Of course they did! The rhymes are the DUMBEST FUN OF ALL.

Herein you’ll see all the contestants from countries beginning A through I, and the remainder will go up in the next post. Which will be a bit later this afternoon, thanks to some Royal Engagement-related monkeying with our daily schedule.